Get on with it

A Thing.

2008-07-17T08:55:00.000-07:00

When I was very young I had a toy doctor set, as many children do. I think my only patients were my stuffed animals and my younger brother. I have a vague recollection of putting a fake plastic band-aid cuff on his arm. It was when he was in his roly-poly, pudgy stage that he bounced around in ages zero to two. So I must have been three or four when I mended his fake ouchie with my fake band-aid.

I remember that the toy kit came with a plastic stethoscope that was too small for my toddler head. But I was very serious about playing doctor, so I shoved the yellow plastic ear pieces into my ear canals and endured the pain. My head throbbed as I listened in vain for the sound of my brother’s heartbeat, moving the grey foam listening doodad over his chest and back like my own pediatrician did. “Breath in”, I would say. “And out. Ok good.”

I don’t think I ever diagnosed anything more serious than a mild skin lesion as I didn’t have the tools to fix a heart murmur or pneumonia or whatever it was that I was looking for with that dreadful stethoscope. Most of my toys suffered from horrible neglect, so a kit with so many pieces was soon dismembered and forgotten.

Around fourth grade I was rummaging through one of our wooden cabinets looking for art supplies for some outrageous school project (making a model of the solar system, most likely). As I filtered my way through a rainbow of pipe cleaners and the remains of half finished art projects I rediscovered my old toy doctor’s kit, sitting in the back of the cabinet.

Its little brown vinyl bag was dusty and ripping at the corners. I pulled it out and opened up the plastic handles to peer inside. The only piece that lay remaining was that stethoscope.

I took it out and looked it over. It was slightly dusty and the yellow ear pieces seemed to be smeared with a grayish substance (probably the remains of dried up toddler ear wax). I used my shirt to wipe off some of the grime then moved the ear pieces into place. The blue plastic “Y” pushed my ears closer together and squished my brain in its shell, causing me to squeeze my eyes shut. But I sat there with the yellow buds in my ears, trying to endure that pain. I looked around for something to listen to and, finding nothing in the immediate vicinity, settled on lifting up my shirt and listening to my heart. Breathing in and out.

Why am I WHAT?

2008-04-08T18:51:00.000-07:00

I shouldn't be writing here. This is crazy. This is just nuts. But that is why I am writing here. Because I practice extreme procrastination. Enough.

Graduation is so close that I can taste the iron in its thick, crimson blood and I loooooove it. But after that feast I will soon be hungry, and what could possibly quench my thirst for life changing events? Perhaps a temp job in the mountains of West Virginia. Oh. Hell. Yes.

I will be saving cerulean warblers from extinction, tagging hawks with radio transmitters, getting massively wasted and possibly getting a tan. What? It will be a kick ass summer for shizzle.

Ugh paper...now.

Liz

This is heavy, doc!

2008-01-19T14:18:00.000-08:00

I'm around, just not blogging. Things are changing, other things are staying the same.

The biggest news is that I have a Macbook that the school is lending me for the semester. I know, right? Pretty sweet. I have to make movies for a class called Writing with Video. For that class I HAVE to blog, and that blog is here:

http://podcast.ics.uiuc.edu/wp/econdon2/

But it's not going to be personal stuff. I mean, it's how I personally feel about watching films and making them, but that's it. Check it out if you feel so inclined.

I love you all.

Frick!

2007-12-01T22:10:00.000-08:00

Thank you Elliot Reid, for providing a catch phrase that so perfectly describes the way I feel. 0/45 pages written, with one research paper late already.

Yet, like blond doctor's infallible ability to bounce back by the end of each 20 minute episode, I will prevail. With maybe 10% knocked off my grade.

I am going to Europe this winter. I am getting there on a plane, and I am leaving on a plane. I don't know how I am getting around for the in between planes time, but I am guessing it will be planes, trains, automobiles, and my own two feet. Maybe also a sea kayak (keep your fingers crossed people).

Finals are just around the rubber band, and then a big ol pancake stack of holiday shopping for loved ones (AND hated ones), and then I'm off to GAY Paris. gahahahahahahaaaaa

Ok back to work.

It's poppin

2007-09-29T13:46:00.000-07:00

What is up my Kramas?

Just chillin. Writing an abstract. Oh wait no, I'm writing a blog instead.

Things are swimming along, and I am no longer being sucked down into a whirlpool of emotion and emoticons. :-)

I spent last weekend hiking, camping and whitewater rafting in West Virginia on the upper Gauley River. It was no less than supa dupa fly. 60 rapids in 5 hours, 5 class 5 rapids. I got dumped 3 or 4 times. I'm going back ASAP, hopefully in the spring with my family. Seriously, a great place.

Here is a "carnage" video from the river I rafted. Check out the Dildo hits around 2/3 of the way through. http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-4975456070922767135&hl=en

In the spring I graduate, and after that it's up in the air. I'll work for a least a year. Let's see if my degree gets me anywhere.

I need a haircut.

Love,
Lizzie

Emo for the day

2007-09-16T22:25:00.000-07:00

Mostly I feel good, but sometimes I get emo. Right now I am emo.

Electronics are stressing me out, as is a more private situation. I’m trying to synthesize my thoughts on global warming in a 5 page report, but getting past half a page is proving to be impossible right now. I feel like crashing and burning, so Amy gave me a cigarette and I went outside to smoke it. I’m at the UIUC Undergrad Library, in the lower level, so when I exited to smoke I really entered a courtyard that is in a giant ditch of sorts. The undeniable symbolism of smoking a cigarette in a massive ditch was simply crushing. I felt like putting out the cigarette in my eye, taking shots of tequila until passing out and puking up my intestines in the neatly placed shrubbery.

But that was just a short lived fantasy. Right now I actually do feel like I might throw up. Stupid cigarette. Stupid me for smoking a cigarette. Stupid climate change for making me feel like a useless output of carbon.

Ahhhh. That almost feels better. Ranting to the internet was just what I needed. Now all I need is my cell phone back and for my computer to stop being a little shit. And a date.

Lizzie

Fall 07 Schedule

2007-09-05T06:02:00.000-07:00

Classes:
Physics 101: I Haven't Done This Since High School
Environmental Studies 301: Global Warming is Real Suckas
Geography 466: Forget Everything You Knew About Environmental Politics
American Indian Studies 490: Oh Shit This is Cross Listed as a Literature Course
Environmental Studies 299: Making Stuff Happen

Work:
Catching birds for the state of Illinois

Activities:
Students for Environmental ConcernS (president)
Writing on the Wall (director)
Student Sustainability Committee (member)

Fun:
Drinkin, campin, sleepin, knittin, you know.

Getting there

2007-05-06T16:56:00.000-07:00

Hey y'all. By "y'all" I'm not sure who I mean, since probably 2 people read this. So, hey you two.

It's the end of the year. I still have 3 papers and a final left, but it's pretty much over. My oh MY it was a strange year.

In addition to finally getting the facial hair I've always wished for, I learned a lot. Inside the classroom I learned many things: how to identify over 200 bird species, the unique struggle of African-American women, the difference between a green darter and a rainbow darter, what the inside of a rattlesnake looks like, how many ATPs are generated per turn of the Krebs cycle (just kidding I already forgot that). Outside of the school setting I got schooled as well. I don't care to divulge.

Friends came and went. My residents moved in and out. Food went mostly in (except for once when it came back out of my mouth).

HIGHLIGHTS (for no reason in no order!)

ASB trips to San Juan, Texas and Pittsboro, North Carolina

Bike tune ups for SECS

Getting close with some of my residents

Being a programming fiend

Playing Zelda on the Wii for 2 nights

Watching the board of trustees and the student population struggle around the Chief

Writing for the Green Observer

Being friends with MJ

Going to Iowa with Adam and Casey for a night

Being single

Never wearing my retainer

Living in Champaign again

Chasing birds through the Champaign wilderness

Gaining weight (and rarely working out)

I'm sure something else happened, but overall it was a great year. In many ways I progressed, and in many ways I regressed. Overall there was a net positive gain, I believe. Sometimes I don't feel like it, but at this time last year I was so much more of a dumb ass. I haven't progressed from an advancement of knowledge, but from increased amounts of critical thinking. And that has been the greatest thing about this campus this year. We all have thought freaking hard about our words and actions, and we all have held each other accountable for the ridiculous things that have been happening.

A lovely year, really. But right now I'm remembering that it's not over yet, so I'll leave you with a picture.

LK

Einstein had it wrong

2007-04-07T16:40:00.000-07:00

God does play with dice. It's called quantum physics.

I just wanted to make that clear.

Super happy hyper blog

2007-02-26T00:06:00.000-08:00

Yeah, I'm just kidding. I'm not super, happy, or hyper at the moment. It's 2am and I'm getting fucked by academics, but that's ok.

Things of note that have happened to me recently:

- Cardinal research is swimming along. As of Friday we have collected data from 4 cardinals. There has been a casualty. RIP band# 1222-63791. Died on February 16th between 8 and 9pm. Cause of death: attack by predator, most likely an owl.

- I had a sweet program on white culture, which at first seemed like it would be a horrible, horrible disaster. After quite a bit of panic we ended up with a very fruitful dialogue. Probably my best program all year, but also a complete mistake that it ended up being as successful as it was.

- I am going to San Juan, Texas this spring break. Helping migrant farm workers with their rights and maybe working on my Spanish.

- Applied for some internships. It looks like my kick ass professor is going to hook me up with a job at the Illinois Natural History Survey this summer, but I felt like applying for some other internships anyways, because I am all about the paper work. Just kidding. But seriously, I'm waiting to hear back from U Oregon, Kansas State, Davison College and U Alaska-Southeast.

I think that's all I can remember. Also, I should study more. This is harder than I thought it was going to be.

That's what she said.

Or he said.

Le Tigre

2007-01-21T09:24:00.000-08:00

Service trip to The Carnivore Preservation Trust in Pittsboro, North Carolina.

Because he made me

2006-12-15T17:21:00.000-08:00

Nathan said I have to update, and when Nathan tells you to do something...well, you don't fuck with Nathan.

Goals for winter break:

1. Get a dang internship.

Maybe I could go to Washington State and work with these girls.

2. Read 2 good books

This will be one of them. I like the cover. The other one is up for grabs. I have to read a book by Barack Obama in order to keep my job, but that's fine because I love Obama. I listen to his podcast when he has time to make them. He makes them on Thursdays, so every Thursday I imagine Barack Obama telling me it is Thursday when I wake up. Then he tells me about some policy or something. I just like listening to his voice. I think I might have a thing for him, like the way I have a shameful crush on Michael Jordan 10 years ago. It's sick and weird, but I just think success is sexy.

3. Do some research on fish salinty tolerance across phylogenies (no biggie, don't ask about it)

I could explain it, but you wouldn't like it.

4. Read up on habitat corridors

This will be the focus of my research for the next year and a half. I have been training with a wonderful woman named Tara under the tutelage of Professor Mike Ward, who will be my ornithology professor next semester. Tara and I catch birds, she takes their blood, and we stick bands on their legs. Sometimes the birds bite us. Sometimes we catch squirrels. Sometimes we sit in the the car and talk about boys. Sometimes we catch a morning dove and it almost bleeds to death. Well that last thing only happened one time. I've had a great time thus far, and next semester I'll be having even more fun tracking American Cardinals (the bird, not the baseball team) across the South Farms. My research will have direct implications for the new development project on the South Farms. I mean, I really hope it does.

5. Study for the GRE.

I hate standardized tests.

6. Work out.

Let's face it, I've gotten chubs.

I don't know, that's it. Stuff has been happening, but nothing blogger worthy. Just chillin. Kinda. I can't wait to get home, go on my trip to NC, and come back refreshed.

I will try to update more frequently, but I don't really know what to blog about. I don't feel like I should be adding any more useless crap to the internet than is already here. I write my own useless crap down in a private journal that I don't let near my computer. I've been cutting off my ties to the internet lately, which is exhilerating and kind of depressing all at once. It's nice to have relationships that are not text based, but it's also sad to see how many of my "friends" depended on the internet to get in contact with me. But that's ok, the real friends stuck around and tolerate my analogue tendencies.

--Liz

Revenge

2006-08-15T11:26:00.000-07:00

Here are 3 pretty good songs about what? Vengeance.

The Company Store--Greg MacPherson

I slammed the door at quarter to four
I was headed for the company store
"I'll watch my children starve no more
Tonight I'm going to feed them"

"I haven't worked in 40 days
For 23 I've had no pay
In a week I'll have no place to stay
In an hour they'll have to kill me"

On the way I met big Johnny Hines
The strongest man in Sydney Mines
I told big Johnny of my plight
His voice grew loud with anger
"Todays as good a day to die
As any that'll come to mind
I have at home a sickly wife
And I haven't worked since Easter"
We hadn't worked since easter

Half the town'll die from the mining of the coal
The other half'll leave when the mine decides to close
The people who are left will starve to death at the hands of the company store
And they'll bring the army in on us when the union gets to close to them

BURN IT DOWN BOYS!
BURN IT DOWN BOYS!
BURN IT DOWN I SAID, TO THE HEAD!
They'll shoot us down like our fathers but like them we're already dead and down.

Our anger built and tightly wound
We walked the coal road through the town
"The store," I yelled, "We'll burn it down, Burn it to a cynder!"
As I spoke these words before my eyes
Their doors and windows opened wide
And 10 more miners joined my side
Beaten, starved and angered
We were beaten, starved and angered

Half the town'll die from the mining of the coal
The other half'll leave when the mine decides to close
The people who are left will starve to death at the hands of the company store
And they'll bring the army in on us when the union gets to close to them

BURN IT DOWN BOYS!
BURN IT DOWN BOYS!
BURN IT DOWN I SAID, TO THE HEAD!
They'll shoot us down like our mothers but like them we're already dead and down.

I slammed the door at quarter to four
I was headed for the company store
"I'll watch my children starve no more
Tonight I'm going to feed them"

"I haven't worked in 40 days
For 23 I've had no pay
In a week I'll have no place to stay
In an hour they'll have to kill me"

Half the town'll die from the mining of the coal
The other half'll leave when the mine decides to close
The people who are left will starve to death at the hands of the company store
And they'll bring the army in on us when the union gets to close to them

BURN IT DOWN BOYS!
BURN IT DOWN BOYS!
BURN IT DOWN I SAID, TO THE HEAD!
They'll shoot us down like our fathers but like them we're already dead and down.

The Mariner's Revenge Song--The Decemberists

We are two mariners
Our ship's sole survivors
In this belly of a whale
It's ribs are ceiling beams
It's guts are carpeting
I guess we have some time to kill

You may not remember me
I was a child of three
And you, a lad of eighteen
But, I remember you
And I will relate to you
How our histories interweave
At the time you were
A rake and a roustabout
Spending all your money
On the whores and hounds
(oh, oh)

You had a charming air
All cheap and debonair
My widowed mother found so sweet
And so she took you in
Her sheets still warm with him
Now filled with filth and foul disease
As time wore on you proved
A debt-ridden drunken mess
Leaving my mother
A poor consumptive wretch
(oh, oh)

And then you disappeared
Your gambling arrears
The only thing you left behind
And then the magistrate
Reclaimed our small estate
And my poor mother lost her mind
Then, one day in spring
My dear sweet mother died
But, before she did
I took her hand as she, dying, cried:
(oh, oh)

"Find him, Bind him
Tie him to a pole and break
His fingers to splinters
Drag him to a hole until he
Wakes up naked
Clawing at the ceiling
Of his grave"

It took me fifteen years
To swallow all my tears
Among the urchins in the street
Until a priory
Took pity and hired me
To keep their vestry nice and neat
But, never once in the employ
Of these holy men
Did I ever, once turn my mind
From the thought of revenge
(oh, oh)

One night I overheard
The prior exchanging words
With a penitent whaler from the sea
The captain of his ship
Who matched you toe to tip
Was known for a wanton cruelty
The following day
I shipped to sea
With a privateer
And in the whistle
Of the wind
I could almost hear
(oh, oh)

"Find him, Bind him
Tie him to a pole and break
His fingers to splinters
Drag him to a hole until he
Wakes up naked
Clawing at the ceiling
Of his grave

There is one thing I must say to you
As you sail across the sea
Always, your mother will watch over you
As you avenge this wicked deed"

And then, that fateful night
We had you in our sight
After twenty months, it seemed
Your starboard flank abeam
I was getting my muskets clean
When came this rumbling from beneath
The ocean shook
The sky went black
And the captain quailed
And before us grew
The angry jaws
Of a giant whale

(oh..)

Don't know how I survived
The crew all was chewed alive
I must have slipped between his teeth
But, oh, what providence
What divine intelligence
That you should survive
As well as me
It gives my eye great joy
To see your eyes fill with fear
To lean in close
And I will whisper
The last words you'll hear
(oh, oh)

And the always classic...The Payback--James Brown
hey! Gotta gotta pay back!! (The big payback)
Revenge!! I'm mad (the big payback)
Got to get back! Need some get back!! Pay Back! (the big payback)
That's it!! Payback!!! Revenge!!!
I'm mad!!

Get down with my girlfriend, That ain't right!!
Hollarin' cussin', you wanna fight
Payback is a thing you gotta see
Brother do any damn thing to me

Sold me out, for chump change (yes you did!!)
Told me that they, they had it all arranged
You handed me down, and thats a fact
Now you're pumped, You gotta get ready For the big payback!! (the big
payback!!)
That's where I am, the big payback (the big payback!!)

I can do wheelin', I can do dealin' (yes you can!!) But I don't do no damn
squealin'
I can dig rappin', I'm ready!! I can dig scrappin'
But I can't dig that backstabbin' (Oh No!!)

The brother get ready!! Thats a fact!!
Get ready you Mother, for the big payback (The big Payback!!)
Let me hit 'em hit'em!! Hey Hey!! WOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Took my money, you got my honey
Don't want me to see what you doing to me
I got to get back I gotta deal with you!! (4xs) Hey let me tell ya!!
Get down with my woman, that ain't right! You hollarin' and cussin', you wanna
fight!!
Don't do me no darn favor,
I don't know karate, but I know KA-RAZY!!!! (yes we do!!)

Get ready thats a fact, Get ready you Mother for the big payback (the big
payback!)
Hey!! I'm a man! I'm a man! I'm a son of a man, but don't they tell ya then
hop again
Get ready for the big payback (the big payback!!) Hit 'em again!!
Get ready I need it, I need a hit again!! Say it once (3xs) Hit 'em
again!!
(the big payback!!) Sold me out for chump change
Said my woman had it all arranged
Tryin' to make a deal, she wants to squeal But I had my boys on her heals
Saw me comin', told a lie Went down like you wanted to cry
I don't care what she does, she'll be doin' just like she was
Take your kids and raise them up, Somebody think I have a right to be tough
Take her, take that woman, it's one place she found
Just run that mother out of town!!
Got to get up!! Got to get up, get out!! (2xs)
I'm mad!! I want revenge, I want revenge (the big payback!!) I want revenge
(3xs)
(the big payback!!) Give me those hits!! I want some hits!! I need those
hits, hit me!!

Either I'm listening to vengeful music because I feel vengeful, or listening to vengeful music is making me vengeful...anyways, if I have reason to seek revenge on you I would go into hiding for a week or so.

--Lizzie

I miss it.

2006-08-05T09:43:00.000-07:00

"It is impossible in a paragraph to communicate to the stranger the appearance of the country. It cannot be done by analogy. The New Zealand traveler is often reminded of his country. A gully in California, carpeted with scrub…a glimpse of the sea over a ridge crested with pines in Provence…the view across an English moor…But in its general aspect it is unique. Within a small area there is a remarkable variety of scenery: mountains to challenge the Swiss; ‘sounds’ to rival the Norwegian fiords; plains so large that, crossing them, a man feels himself in the centre of a continent; beaches to compare with the Australia; beech forest and dense rain forest; a thermal region and glow-worm caves of unworldly beauty. As it was fifty years ago, so it is today, rough, untamed. The farms look newly occupied. The towns, mostly wooden bungalows, each with its either-or quarter-acre ‘section’, appear unfinished, temporary. Man has not been here long, and there is little of his handiwork to admire. What is beautiful belongs to nature—nature which men have despoiled and burned. Only in a few localities is there landscape which resembles the polished, man-made beauty of the English countryside. The light, too, is not veiled as in England; it stares with a Mediterranean boldness. But the historian must surrender the task of description or comparison to a poet or painter. If, in this passage, the American or British reader finds nothing to call up in his mind an image of these islands, he may, at least, imagine readily the feelings of the New Zealanders for their home."

--Keith Sinclair, A History of New Zealand

I'm over here now

2006-07-31T21:40:00.000-07:00

I made a new blog because the old one was just for New Zealand. I guess. To be honest I'm still feeling the impact of that experience, and I will continue to be affected by it for a good while, but I am in a new place and that justifies a new URL.

Or something.

Here is a song I like:

Nowhere With You - The Joel Plaskett Emergency

Hey good lookin’, why the frown
You always look better when its upside down
You say you’ve got nowhere that you’re going to
Can I go nowhere with you

I took the Dartmouth ferry into the town
Spent my pennies bummin’ around
Trying to find a way to tear a strip off these blues
Can I go nowhere with you

Paid the cover, saw the show
Sat at the bar where the drinks did flow
Didn’t see a single face that I knew
‘Til I went nowhere with you

Can I tag along tonight
We’ll kill some time, it looks like you might
Need a little company
I’m so cheap, I might as well be free

Hey good lookin’, why the frown
You always look better when its upside down
You say you’ve got nowhere that you’re going to
Can I go nowhere with you

Here we go!
Na, na, na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na, na, na
Can I go nowhere with you, again
Na, na, na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na, na, na
Can I go nowhere with you

Can I tag along tonight
We’ll kill some time, it looks like you might
Need a little company
I’m so cheap, I might as well be free
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa

If you get tired & want to go home
I’m still wired, I can go it alone
Same time next week at a quarter past ten
And we can go nowhere again

If you show up then, then you know I will too
Can I go nowhere with...

Hey good lookin’, why the frown
You always look better when its upside down
You say you’ve got nowhere that you’re going to
Can I go nowhere with you

Na, na, na, na, na, na
(Hey good lookin’)
Na, na, na, na, na, na
(Hey, hey good lookin’)
Na, na, na, na, na, na
(You’ve got nowhere that you’re going to)
Can I go nowhere with you
Can I go nowhere with you
(Can I go)
Can I go nowhere with you
(Can I go)
Can I go nowhere with you
(Nowhere with you)

Thank you Canada, for hockey, bacon and tastey independent rock. Fuck you for Avril Lavigne and Canadian geese. But mostly thank you.